Lily's Diary
by Antigonesev
Summary: a what-if fic... Severus Snape discovers a secret woven into Lily Evans's diary, Harry's life turns upside down, yet another usual fic.. or is it? (SnapeLily)
1. Discoveries & Secrets

Disclaimer: All HP characters belong to JK rowling, of course. I'm just having fun with them. Read on! :)  
  
As Harry Potter watched Severus Snape prowl along the aisles of the classroom, Severus took in a sharp breath, he was just like Lily. He could remember her green eyes as she studied his figure under lowered eyes, the blush to her cheeks and lips as he whispered in her ear, the round 'o' of surprise her lips formed as a rose was drawn from thin air and presented to her by a lover. Severus suddenly snarled at Potter, memories of days long gone by stinging in his heart.   
  
  
  
*Why Lily?* Snape thought.  
  
  
  
Albus Dumbledore watched from a crystal ball the proceedings of the potions class, watching Severus yell at young Harry yet again, about how unsatisfactory his potions were. He knew the man was hurting, and had been hurting for seventeen years. Faded blue eyes closed, and a mind remembered a fresh spring day, a day for lovers. He remembered laughter of a young couple running down the corridors, hands clasped and faces flushed, hair flying in the air. Ah, young love, how fragile it was.   
  
  
  
*Why Severus?* Albus whispered.  
  
  
  
Minerva McGonagall entered the staffroom, and found the man in black brooding yet again in his customary corner. His eyes were dull, and lacked the sparkle she used to see back in his school days, when he sat next to Lily Evans in classes, the two whispering to each other, heads bowed over sheafs of parchment.  
  
"Severus? is everything all right?"  
  
"Peachy." Severus slurred, raising an eyebrow and coughing slightly. Minerva wrinkled her nose as the strong, unmistakable stench of Vodka hit her. He had been drinking himself away, probably since after his last lesson let out for the day.   
  
"How much have you had, Severus?" the woman asked sharply, her mouth drawn into a thin, nearly nonexistent line. Severus frowned and slouched in his chair, holding up a bottle.   
  
"Six, I think."  
  
"Good Lord! we'd better get you to poppy."  
  
"No!" Severus said, jumping up from his seat. "No... I can't go to Poppy. Not when I've figured it out." Severus said, holding up a book, which seemed to be a worn-out leather diary of some sort. Severus was waving it around, spilling the vodka on the floor, nearly on top of a napping Filius Flitwick.   
  
"Severus, you're drunk out of your mind."  
  
"No! it hasn't been clearer, not since.. not since that night." Dear lord, the man was raving, Minerva thought sadly as she took Severus by the arm and took him to Poppy by floo, it just wouldn't do to have a drunken teacher stumbling down the halls to Poppy's.   
  
  
  
*Why do you do these things, Severus?* Minerva moaned.  
  
Severus Snape's eyes flew open, and his hand flew to his chest, where it was bare. Severus turned his head and found the book on a bedside, he was in the hospital wing. Damn Minerva. He remembered most of what had occurred that night. Lily's diary. He had found it, it had stumbled into his lap literally as he had reached for a potions tome high in the restricted section's shelves. It had been quite the surprise to see that small tome come falling out of his most favorite book: Most Potente Potions, as if Lily intended for him to find it. It was all too odd, Severus thought as he watched Poppy bustle over to his side to check him up.   
  
"Tsk tsk, drinking again, Severus?"  
  
"Shut up, you bat."  
  
"Back to your sweet self, I see." Poppy tsk tsked once again before shoving one of his soberity potions down his throat. Probably revenge for the bat bit. He really did have to watch his mouth, he thought as he narrowed his eyes at Poppy Pomfrey and frowned sharply as he watched the mediwitch shake her head sadly at him and walk away.   
  
*Poor Severus Snape, why him?* Poppy thought.  
  
Severus eyed the diary warily and slowly took it from its perch on the nightstand, fingering the worn leather cover, which had "LILY EVANS, YEAR 7" stamped on the cover. He gently fingered the year, "1977" and then slowly and reverently opened the diary to the first page.   
  
  
  
*Why did Lily do this?* Severus sighed.   
  
  
  
The old man stood in the shadows, watching a tear trickle down the younger man's cheek, and knew at that moment, everything would change forever. He didn't know how, but he could feel the imminent change in his bones.   
  
Severus let out a strangled gasp as his eyes flicked down to the bottom of the last page of the diary, the candlelight flickering near his nightstand. His obsidan eyes sharpened as he slowly lifted his pale head and smiled, slowly slipping out of the hospital bed, padding quickly but surely down to the dungeons, the diary clasped in his lithe hands.   
  
*Perhaps, there is something worth living for* Severus smiled.  
  
A/N: I normally am a SS/HG shipper but thought why not? the muse struck me to write an extremely unique Lily/Snape fic. Hope y'all like it, I am still kind of new to the fandom, though.. 


	2. Down in the Dungeon

Harry Potter watched the potions master stride down the corridors, lost in thought, arms wrapped around a leather book. It seemed like the hounds of hell were after him, but oddly enough, for once, he had not had a scowl on his face.   
  
  
  
*What happened to Snape?* Harry thought.  
  
Severus immediately set to work, flipping open the diary to the entry dated September 22, 1977. He could recall that day in his memory quite clearly. He could see Lily's smile and the flush of her cheeks as she touched down on the field, her hair windswept from a long flying session. The scent of her hair, and the warm softness of her body echoed in his mind as he quickly selected a few bottles of various substances and poured them into the cauldron. He then added Veela's blood, dragon heartsrings, fluxweed, and several other essences of rarity.   
  
  
  
*Lily!* Snape whispered.   
  
  
  
Severus then grabbed a silver knife, slowly drawing it along his wrist, letting loose a small river of his blood, letting it drip freely into the cauldron. When he felt enough had been drained, he closed the wound with a bandage, choosing to allow it to display as a sign of his love for the woman.   
  
As an afterthought, Severus made a copy of the diary, putting it into his desk as he put the original in the cauldron, invoking a very loud and earth-shattering eruption, shaking the very bowels of the castle.   
  
*SEVERUS!* Albus shouted.   
  
  
  
Headmaster Dumbledore, Headmistress McGonagall, and Argus Filch immediately headed down to the dungeons along with Poppy Pomfrey to see what Severus Snape had done now, he had not been himself ever since the death of Voldemort two months prior. He had crawled into a bottle, never to emerge until they had pumped his stomach a few days prior.   
  
  
  
The dungeons were in a shambles. Rock and mortar was everywhere, desks demolished, cauldrons upturned, and heaven forbid, the door to his private stores was completely shattered. A thck haze of purple hung over the room, making it hard to see into the fog.   
  
"Severus? Severus!" Minerva shouted as Albus, Poppy and Argus shifted through the rubble. They finally found a long pale arm poking out from under a desk.   
  
"Oh dear." Albus whispered as he crouched down and saw the person under the desk. "We had better wait for Severus to make some explainations as to this situation."  
  
"What explainations are necescarry, Albus?" Severus Snape bit out coldly as he emerged from the mist, brushing off his robes. "Merely an labratory accident."  
  
"My boy, in the years I have known you, you never have wreaked such havoc in the dungeons, much less even Neville Longbottom."  
  
"Why do you persist on prattling on and on while something needs to be done?" Severus snapped as he inclined his head to the figure under the desk. Severus's cheeks flushed as he caught a flutter of movement, of green orbs slowly fluttering open.   
  
  
  
*Dear Merlin* Albus gasped.  
  
*He's done the impossible* Minerva swooned.  
  
  
  
*Oh dear* Poppy whispered as she gathered the pale form in her arms and immediately flooed herself to the infirmary, the annoying batlike professor breathing down her neck the entire way, with the headmaster fanning a weak-kneed Minerva to cosciousness on the way.   
  
  
  
*What a night this is going to be* Severus thought wryly.  
  
A/N: sorry abt the cliffie, but please do read and review.. :) 


	3. The Hospital Wing

The hospital wing fell into an hush as Poppy put the pale and long-limbed body on the bed, bustling off to gather some potions and ointments, leaving Albus, Minerva, and Severus to sit at the bedside.   
  
  
  
*Why, Severus?* Minerva thought  
  
  
  
Severus took in a sharp breath as he watched the ample chest fall and rise in a steady rhythym. It had been years since he had seen the very same thing. He could remember the heady feel of that same chest under his hands, skimming over her torso...  
  
  
  
"Severus?"   
  
"Headmaster, I..." Severus began, but was silenced as the woman's eyes fluttered open, revealing deep emerald green orbs flecked with gold. Her mouth opened in a 'O' of surprise, and her hand slowly reached out to lightly lay itself upon Severus's.   
  
"Severus?" the woman replied in hardly a whisper, a small tear forcing its way out of her eye.   
  
"Yes, it is I." Severus replied softly, not recoiling from the gentle caress her hand gave his, her eyes roaming over his lithe form. "It has been quite a while, I warrant." he replied wryly as the woman slowly tried to sit up.   
  
  
  
"Don't you dare." Poppy called out as she arrived at the bedside. "You've been through a lot, I daresay, after what Severus has done. Now, why don't you go and rest?"  
  
"I'm all right, Poppy, don't worry." rosebud lips spoke, Severus all too fasnicated by the small pout, and the sensual cupid's bow of her upper lip. "I just would love some time with Severus... Please?"  
  
"Oh, all right." Poppy said, throwing up her arms. "But not before you drink this, dear girl."  
  
"All right." The woman replied cheerfully as she swallowed down a thick amber liquid. "Yech.. one of yours, Severus?" An arched eyebrow went with the comment, as Severus snorted lightly, shaking his head. As Poppy walked away with Albus, the two in deep discussion, the woman turned to face Severus more wholly, putting both her hands over Severus's. "So, you found my diary?"  
  
"Yes. Whatever poesessed you to put it there? I thought it had been destroyed when..."  
  
"Never! I would never allow Potter near it. Near Hogwarts. Near you." The woman finished off in a whisper, her eyes studying Severus's. Fingers slowly found themselves entwined, as Severus looked away for a moment, and then looked back, a pale rosy flush on his cheeks.   
  
"I missed you, I just.. I thought this would be the right time."  
  
"That means... he's dead?" the woman asked, her eyes wide and mouth open. Severus nodded and smiled wryly. "Who?"  
  
"The Order." Severus said with a smile as a loud bang reverbrated through the hall. "Stupid gits."   
  
"Severus, what if..." auburn eyebrows rose in annoyance.   
  
"Come with me, perhaps you'll be more comfortable in my rooms." Severus whispered, lifting the woman into his arms, shielding her face from the newest occupants of the hospital wing: Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter, and Ron Weasley.   
  
"Ten points from Gryffindor, Potter, for disrupting the patients. Now, I have work to do." Snape said in a dark tone as he brushed past Harry with the woman in his arms and disappeared into the fireplace.  
  
  
  
"Lily."  
  
"Severus...."  
  
  
  
Dark whispers, creaks, and heated kisses filled the dark dungeons. Sweat dripping, gasps, and whimpers filled the night air, and nothing else could be heard for the rest of the night. Utterances of love whispered, as two sets of eyes drifted closed, two bodies twined together in a nest of bedsheets awaiting the dawn of a new day to come.  
  
  
  
*~to be continued~*  
  
A/N: please do R/R.. I would love it. 


	4. The Headmaster's Office

As the dawn light flitted through a thin window, Severus laid in bed, his arms around Lily's waist.   
  
  
  
*It wasn't a dream* Severus thought. Lily was really in his arms after all these years. Severus held her tighter, nuzzling at the nape of her neck, inhaling the scent of holly in her hair, the warm peach texture of her skin. How he had missed the warmth in his bed after these years.   
  
  
  
"Severus, love..." Lily whispered, turning over to face him, their bodies pressing from torso to knee. "I knew you would do it."  
  
"Lily." Severus whispered, a small twitch at the edge of his mouth. Lily smiled and lowered her eyes, entwining her fingers with Severus's as the two shared a warm good-morning kiss.   
  
  
  
"I do need to go to classes." Severus whispered a hour later, bending over Lily and giving her one last kiss. Lily nodded and smiled, getting up from the bed and heading over to the bathroom to freshen up. "Headmaster Dumbledore probably will want to talk to you after you are freshened up."  
  
"you also." Lily shot back sharply as she headed into the bathroom, leaving Severus in the room to sigh and stalk away in his usual batlike fashion.   
  
Lily was in heaven. She had a nice night and morning with Severus, and had a glorious shower and breakfast. Things just couldn't get any better than this. She hummed as she searched for the floo powder to travel to Headmaster Dumbledore's office, she knew Severus would be angry with her if he saw her prowling the hallways. It was just too risky.   
  
"Mrs. Potter, welcome." Albus said with a smile as he gestured for Lily to take a seat. Severus was already there, sitting stiffly in a wingback chair, his hands folded across his chest in typical fashion.   
  
"I'm not Mrs. Potter anymore." Lily declared haughtily as she took a seat as close as to Severus as she could manage. Dumbledore raised his eyebrows as did Severus, the two men gazing at Lily with mild surprise and intrest in their eyes.   
  
"Do explain, Lily, Severus. I would like an inkling as to what dark arts is being performed in my school." Dumbledore said with a touch of ice to his voice, his blue eyes steely and focused on the couple in front of him. Lily took Severus's hand into hers, and indicated she would begin the story, her green eyes sad but yet merry, sparkling each time she whispered Severus's name.   
  
  
  
*I love this man* Lily thought as she began the story, which began during her sixth year at Hogwarts....  
  
A/N: sorry for the evil cliffies, but it helps to update daily. The next chapter tells the entire story leading up to what happened, so don't worry, you'll get the back story. I'm not THAT evil. but do please R/R.. it helps me improve my skills. ^_^ 


	5. Is this Heaven?

A/N: this chapter takes place in 1977 to 1980, mostly a series of ecounters. just FYI.   
  
Lily Evans stepped off the train from King's Cross and inhaled the fresh scottish air, it was a blessing to be back home at Hogwarts. She had despised staying with her sister for the summer, she was such a simpering snob. Lily then got in the last carriage, eager to begin her school year, she had already done all of her homework and read nearly all the textbooks.   
  
Severus Snape was sitting across from her, nose into a book. Lily sighed, studying the lithe youth in front of her, taking in the rakish black hair, the dark eyes and hooked nose, the black school uniform that hung on him like rags.   
  
"Snape, Severus Snape, isn't it?" Lily ventured, recalling a nasty scene which she had tried to help him out of back in fifth year when Sirius, Potter, Remus, and Pettigrew had taunted him and hung him upside down in the air.   
  
"Yes, it is I." Severus said, his silky voice resonating through Lily's body, sending a shiver down her spine. She studied Severus with her green eyes, as did he wth his sharp obsidian eyes. The two sat in silence, studying each other for a long while, until the carriage reached a bump in the road, sending Lily sprawling into Sseverus's arms, she had literally been on the edge of her seat, drawn into Severus's eyes.   
  
No one knew who began the action, but the two found themselves kissing each other lightly, a brush of lips which led to a deeper kiss, one of deep, rich promise. The breathless kiss was sharply brought to an end when the carriage jolted to a halt, breaking the two apart.   
  
"I... I need to go." Severus said sharply, his eyes narrowing in suspicion as he slunk out of the carriage, his book pressed to his chest. Lily followed in a light daze, following the crowd of students to the Great Hall.   
  
Severus and Lily avoided each other like the plague until December, when a late night found the two in the library, studying for their upcoming OWL and NEWT tests. Severus was sitting at a table, studying when Lily came by, the familiar scent of holly jolting him out of his studies.   
  
"Severus, is this table taken?" Lily asked lightly, as she slid into a seat next to him. Severus lightly nodded and went back to his studying, achingly aware of Lily's presence next to him.   
  
"I'm sorry I called you a mudblood." Severus suddenly spat out of nowhere, surprised that he had said something, much less even that. A stunned silence followed for several minutes while the two stared at each other in silence. Lily then smiled and shrugged, the lids of her eyes lowered slightly, driving Severus mad.   
  
"I accept, Severus." Severus nodded silently and began packing his bag to leave, he couldn't be in the same room as Lily, she was driving him crazy, the scent of holly, the green eyes, and lord, the hair, the hair...   
  
Severus then found his hands tangled into Lily's red hair, his lips pressed to hers. Lily stiffened with a gasp, and then relaxed into severus's arms, the two slowly tasting each other.   
  
"Severus, we.."  
  
"Lily, we shouldn't..." Severus mumbled as Lily moaned and nodded silently, her lips pressed to Severus's neck. Neither Lily nor Severus stopped kissing until a crash brought them to their senses.   
  
"Tomorrow?" Severus asked right before he disappeared into the darkness of the hallway before the Slytherin common room. Flustered, Lily nodded and smiled, waving goodbye to Severus.   
  
Their nigtly study sessions continued for the rest of sixth year, the two not always kissing, but also holding intelligent conversations and debates, occasionally a chess match or two. One night, Lily suggested for the two to go to the Slytherin & Gryffindor quidditch match together as a couple.   
  
"We can't Lily. Potter and his friends."  
  
"Right." Lily mumbled, disappointd. She had really wanted to be with Severus, not sneak around.   
  
"Although... I could go as Lupin. Remember that Professor Cluny was talking about the polyjuice potion? I could brew that and go as Lupin. It's right after the full moon, he'll be in his rooms all night." Severus said with a small smile as Lily beamed.   
  
"That's so clever, Severus, everyone would not notice the fact that Remus and I would go out on a date. I love you, Sev!" Lily said as she kissed Severus long and deep. Severus chuckled against her lips, twining his arms around her waist, drawing her hips to his. Lily gasped breathlessly, and opened her eyes to meet Severus's.   
  
"Should we?"  
  
"It's up to you, Lily." Severus whispered, his dark eyes hooded and sparkling with desire. "Should we?"  
  
"Yes." Lily whispered as she pressed into Severus, drawing him down for another bone-melting kiss. The two gave their hearts to each other that night in a fit of passion in the library, Severus lowering Lily onto the couch, gently whispering words of comfort and love in her ear. It wasn't Gryffindor and Slytherin, Severus and Lily, it was only a man and a woman who loved each other deeply with a passion.   
  
  
  
A month later, it was the day of the Slytherin & Gryffindor match where Severus would go in disguise as Remus Lupin. Lily had made precautions to make sure Remus reamined in his room as long as necescarry, and Severus carried extra doses of the polyjuice just in case. The two seated themselves in the bleachers, right with Sirius and Peter. Lily felt slightly odd that she was holding hands with Remus Lupin, but reminded herself that it was Severus Snape who was inside.   
  
"You all right, Moony?"  
  
"Just fine, Pettigrew."  
  
"it's Wormtail." Lily whispered, jabbing Severus in the ribs lightly.   
  
"....wormtail." Severus continued, glad that Peter was dumb enough to overlook his blurb. "Excellent match, isn't it, Lily?"  
  
"Yes it is...Moony." Lily said with a giggle as a scowl appeared on Remus's lips. Remus didn't look natural in a scowl. "Oh, you." Lily giggled, kissing Remus full on the lips. Severus shivered, and returned her kiss with slightly more force, drawing her close to him, enjoying the warm body against his.   
  
"...Moony? Lily?" Voices echoed in Severus's head. Annoyed, Severus scowled and opened his eyes to face Lily's. James, Sirius, and Peter had gathered around the two. Apparently, they had been necking the entire match. "Uh, the game's over."  
  
  
  
*Damnination, can't they shut up?* Severus scowled.  
  
  
  
"So what?" Lily grumped, drawing Severus closer to her, narrowing her eyes. "I think ...Moony... will be busy for a while."  
  
"Yes I will, so why don't you--.... go to the castle." Severus said, stopping himself from giving himself away. Severus then grabbed Lily, the two heading off to the lake.   
  
  
  
"Severus, I want us to be together." Lily mumbled into Severus's chest after one late-night study session in the library during their seventh year.   
  
"We will, over the summer."  
  
"Really!?"  
  
"Yes. I have a home in London. Mind you, it's very poor."  
  
"I don't care. I want you, Sev." Lily whispered, reaching up to kiss her lover's thin lips. "Do you love me?"  
  
"With all my heart, Lily." Severus moaned, responding to Lily's kiss with ferocity. "My heart, Lily."  
  
"I've been doing research." Lily burst out later that night as she held up a DADA book. "Love is very powerful."  
  
"Yes... it is." Severus replied, not liking the way the conversation was going. "I've read some things."  
  
"So have I. You do know that the war ..."  
  
"Lily, don't." Severus scowled, his eyes narrowing. "I thought we agreed not to discuss this."  
  
"I know, Sev, but you need to know this. Did you know that you can reserruct someone from the dead?"  
  
"No." Severus said, his eyes wide. "Where did you read that?"  
  
"Right here." Lily said, holding up a thick tome of the Dark Arts. Severus's face paled, and his hands trembled. His voice darkened along with his eyes.   
  
"Where did you get that book, Lily? you know very well that--"  
  
"Hush. I know. Never mind where I got it.." Before Severus could respond, the door to the library burst open, and the Marauders stood in the doorway, wands drawn and eyes wide. James yelled at 'Snivellus' to get away from Lily, how dare ...  
  
"Shut your mouth, Potter."  
  
"You don't own me, James Potter." Lily spat out, reaching for Severus. "Leave us alone."  
  
"Like hell we will. He's an evil git, don't you see? He'll destroy you. Lily, he was Remus Lupin at the match. He was trying to seduce you..."  
  
"I know. I've been seducing him too."  
  
"Since when?" Remus spoke up, his voice tired. He was obviously sick of Sirius and James. "Let's go, I suppose..."  
  
"No, Moony, don't you see..." James trailed off as Severus punched him in the face, glasses flying to the floor. A full knock-down and drag-out fight broke out in the middle of the library. Within minutes, Professors McGonagall and Cluny appeared in their nightclothes, not very pleased. They all ended up serving detention until the last day of school in 1978.   
  
  
  
"I wrote it down, Severus. I have a feeling you'll need it someday." Lily said as she waved her diary in the air. "I'm so sorry, Severus."  
  
"Not as sorry as I am." Severus scowled, as he held up his arm with the Death Mark. "I can't believe that Malfoy and those ..."  
  
"Severus, it's all right. I know we'll pull through. Now, you do understand why I need to marry James?"  
  
"Yes, for the good of the Order."  
  
"We can still see each other, though."  
  
"I know." Severus said with a bitter sigh. "It would be better if it had been myself or at least Remus Lupin, the man's at least honorable."  
  
"Sev, we owe Albus. He was the one who bailed you out."  
  
"All right, all right." Severus said with a scowl. "I don't see why we can't go off to Gretna Green to get married. We're living in sin, dear."  
  
"Thought this was heaven?" Lily giggled, caressing Severus's backside. Severus sighed and shook his head with a sigh.   
  
"It really doesn't bother you to see that tattoo? You know my life is in danger each time I go."  
  
"I know, Severus, it also gives us more incentive to make love each time."  
  
"Argh, Lily, don't you think about anything else?" Severus teased as he kissed Lily in between words. Lily laughed and shook her head. "Shouldn't we tell Albus?"  
  
"I don't think so. I think we should get married after the war. That way, it is safer."  
  
"I agree, Lily."  
  
"So, we're getting married?"  
  
"When that git dies first." Severus mumbled against Lily's breast. "Now, let us concentrate on more important buisness." Severus mumbled as he drew Lily to the mattress for further negotations.   
  
  
  
Severus Snape screamed. He kicked through the door, and sprained his ankle. Lily rushed up to him, helping him down to the chair.   
  
"I tried to fight him off, Sev. I really tried."  
  
"The git. I'll kill..."  
  
"Severus!" Lily shouted, shaking the man. "It won't help. The baby needs to know his father. After all, James Potter is just a sperm donor, nothing more. The boy will be raised as yours, Sev. As soon as the war is done."  
  
"I just .. I hate that git. why did he force himself on you, Lily? You could have just ..." severus roared. Lily sat on Severus's lap, drawing his head into her chest with a sigh. "Could I kill him when the war is done?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"All right, done deal. Kill that git and then marry you. Anything else, Lily?"  
  
"Yes. Love me, Severus. Erase that git's touch." Lily whispered into Severus's ear. "You have what he can never have- my love, my touch, my kisses, my soul. I love you, severus Snape."  
  
"I love you, Lily."  
  
A/N: the next chapter deals with recent events, what the heck Sev did to bring Lily to the world of the living. Hope this chapter was ok? pls do R/R... :-) 


	6. Godric's Hollow

A/N: this chapter takes place during Halloween 1981.  
  
  
  
"Where's Godric's Hollow, Severus?"  
  
"What, Lucky? Oh.. it's just over in Wales." Severus Snape replied snappishly, returning to the parchment he held in his hand, slightly distracted. Lily had sent him a muggle photograph of her little boy, Harry. Lily had vowed once the two married, she would change Harry's name to Peren Snape, a name fit for a Snape. Severus's mouth curled up at the edges, glad for once to read Lily's merry tone in a letter. It had been ages since she had been happy in Godric's Hollow...  
  
  
  
*Godric's Hollow! Lucky! The baby! LILY!* Severus gaped.  
  
  
  
Severus immediately Apparated over to Godric's Hollow, not hesistating to put down the parchment or his mask. He immediately appeared into Lily's private room, and listened silently for any signs of trouble. He wasn't stupid, he had messed up once, and would not do it again. He had to protect Lily and Peren. What god-awful name was Harry, anyway? Snape thought dryly as he slunk over to the baby's room to check up on him.   
  
A little boy was fast asleep in his crib, clutching a toy cauldron. Severus managed to allow a small smile to creep upon his lips. He frowned sharply for a moment, angry for allowing a small indulgement while Lily was in danger...   
  
  
  
"Lily?" Severus whispered as loud as he dared, keeping his eyes alert for his green-eyed lover. He found her fast asleep on the couch, her red hair spread around her head like a halo of flame.   
  
  
  
*thank god for Lucius and his horrible sense of direction* Severus sighed.  
  
  
  
"Sev? Oh, Severus!" Lily gasped, startled awake by Severus's small sigh. "what's wrong? you wouldn't be here in gear if... oh my god, it's ... " Lily trailed off, tears brimming into her eyes and her lower lip trembling.   
  
  
  
"I'm afraid so, yes. I managed to beat Lucky here. I can hide you away.."  
  
"Sev, I can't do that."  
  
"Yes you can, Lily!" Severus spat, pulling himself ramrod straight to his full six-foot frame, towering over five foot four Lily. "What about Peren, and the home in London? I just bought a home suitable for Peren."  
  
  
  
"Thank god he has a decent name, I just wish James hadn't gotten to the baby first." Lily said with a shake of her head as she and Severus made their way upstairs to check upon the baby. "He's so sweet, at least he has black hair like yours."  
  
"Mm, I would rather he was my own, Lily." Severus said wryly.   
  
"You will get that wish, Sev."  
  
"What!? what do... Lily!?" Severus gaped for the second time in that night, shaking his head and narrowing his eyes at the love of his life. "Are you serious? why?"  
  
"I wanted to be part of you, Severus. Plus, James won't suspect anything unless the baby has your eyes, and I can take care of that with a glamourie."  
  
"Lily... That means we have to escape immediately, before anyone gets here. No arguements!" Severus nearly shouted, his face losing any hint of color. "Get Peren, I'll go see if anyone got here, I can hold them off while you Apparate over to my flat."  
  
"Severus..."  
  
"LILY! no arguements. Spare me this, please." Severus said, his black eyes liquid with sadness. Lily let out a shaky breath and smiled a heart-wrenching smile, nodding sweetly as she leaned up to kiss Severus on the lips. The earth moved for Severus as he eagerly kissed Lily back, the two forgetting life for a moment, sharing their love.   
  
  
  
"How sweet, Severus."  
  
"Lucky!" Severus shouted, whirling around in a swirl of black robes. "I see you are here to dispose of James, but he isn't here.. I thought I would have some fun."  
  
"Orders are orders, Snape." Lucius said with a wary eye as he held out his wand. "Perhaps Potter will get the message if we just Kedavra the two."  
  
"Don't touch Lily or the baby." Severus growled, his eyes narrowing. "Let's just wait for Potter, he's due home any moment." Severus whispered as he tried to drive away Lucius Malfoy, putting his body between Lucky and Lily.   
  
  
  
"Lily love, I'm home!" a shout came from downstairs. Severus and Lucius both shared a look as the two glanced at Lily.   
  
"Go downstairs and greet him as if nothing is amiss, take the baby if you like."  
  
"You hold Peren, I'll go take care of things." Lily said with a smile, kissing Severus one last time as she handed him the baby. Lucius shot Severus a dark glare as Lily headed downstairs, chattering away in a slightly wavering voice. Suddenly, Severus heard the front door splinter away, and Lily screaming.   
  
  
  
*oh my god*  
  
  
  
"LILY!" Severus screamed, as he put down Peren in his crib and swooped downstairs with Lucius Malfoy. The two crashed into Lily as she was running upstairs. The three then headed back into the baby's room.   
  
"Take Peren, take us."  
  
"All righ...." Severus began, but then was halted by the enterance of Voldemort. "I will take care of..." Severus began, but trailed off as he was harshly pulled back by Lucius Malfoy. "LUCKY! NO! LILY..." Severus sobbed out, as Lily screamed, throwing herself over the baby, as Severus's eyes filled with tears, the tears streaming down his cheeks.  
  
"SEV..."  
  
"LILY! PEREN!" Severus shrieked, high and keening as he was Petrified by a well-placed spell by Lucius Malfoy. The room filled with a harsh green light, rendering Severus momentarily blind.   
  
  
  
Sobbing filled the room, the sounds of a baby crying. Severus opened his eyes, and sniffled quietly as he took in the sight that befell him. Lord Voldemort was dead, as well as his love, Lily. Lily, of whom he would never hold to his chest and whisper words of love anymore. There was only Peren, no, Potter's brat, Harry. Lily had died protecting him and their unborn child.   
  
  
  
*Our love could never live* Severus sobbed.  
  
  
  
"Diary dada?" Harry sniffled, reaching his arms up to Severus. Severus picked up the baby, sobbing into the baby's raven-black hair. "Diary dada?"  
  
The diary. Snape suddenly reeled, eyes wide with the revelation. He suddenly recalled with sudden clarity, the converstion he and Lily had in thier seventh year. She had found a formula in a Dark Arts book.. of which could bring her back to life. He absolutely had to research the matter. But not at the moment, he could hear voices.   
  
"Sush, Peren." Severus said with a smile as he put the baby down and Disapparated as hope filled up his heart, and he promised he would do anything to get his lily back, as well as their child....  
  
  
  
A/N: pls do r/r! next chappy deals with what Severus did to bring lily back to life. I'll try to update asap. I do have other fics to write.. lol. Thanks to ALL of my readers & reviewers!! 


	7. A Wish Granted

Severus Snape had been a bitter and closed man for nearly seventeen years. He had lost much more than anyone had known: a love, a child, and a life. He liked it that way, that no one knew. Perhaps only Remus Lupin, but the werewolf had such a bleeding heart.   
  
  
  
*Thank god for Lily*   
  
  
  
He returned to his potion, the one that would bring his life back. He had been searching for this damn thing for years, and found it in a fit of anger, when he had knocked down a shelf full of Potions books in the restricted section of the library, right after he had taken points off of the Granger girl for being such a know-it-all and lurking around the library..  
  
  
  
*just like Lily, that girl*  
  
  
  
A sharp breath was inhaled as Severus held the silver blade over his arm, letting his blood drip into the cauldron, it was nearly complete. He could have his life back, his lily. All he needed was the diary, Lily had mentioned she had preserved a part of her soul in the book which was valuable, at least to him. He wasn't all that surprised that Lily had prepared meticulously in the case of her premature death at the hands of evil. That woman did think of everything, Severus smiled wryly as he added the last ingredient, a sprig of holly.   
  
  
  
*BOOM*  
  
  
  
"...and that's when you found me, Albus." Lily said with a smile as she leaned into Severus's side. "I'm as much to blame as Severus is. We were robbed of our lives, of our innocence and love. Due to our actions, we are able to bring a fresh infusion of hope to our lives. You do want your potions-master alive and well for the next hundred years, don't you?"  
  
"Yes I do, Lily, but you did forget something."  
  
"Yes, Peren." Lily whispered, her eyes downcast. "I.. I just can't bring myself to love him, not when he is so much like Potter. I don't think you knew the true implications of our relationship until now."  
  
"Sev?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Marry me, here, now." Lily said, her eyes sparkling. Severus stared at the eager young woman at his side. She looked so youthful for a woman of thirty six, a woman who had been dead for nearly seventeen years.   
  
"Is this what you want, don't you think we're rushing..."  
  
"No. After all, Cissa does need a father."  
  
"What, you've already named the baby?" Severus snorted, with a roll of his eyes. He frowned after he had been pinched by Lily. "Love, I just cannot imagine a life without you again."  
  
"Then let me be Lady Snape."  
  
"You were from day one, Lily." Severus whispered as he kissed Liliy lightly on the lips. A cough from Albus brought him back to reality. "we do need witnesses."  
  
"I can get Remus, Arthur, Molly, and Minerva, and marry you two immediately if that is your wish." Albus said with a twinkle in his eye. "It has been ages since a family has been in Hogwarts. I think Poppy would love having a baby around here again."  
  
  
  
Within moments, Dumbledore's office was filled with people: A stunned Remus Lupin, an uncoscious Molly Weasley, a silent Arthur Weasley, and a suspicious Mad-Eye Moody.  
  
  
  
"Do you, Severus Snape, take this woman as your wedded wife for eternity?"  
  
"I do, Headmaster."  
  
"Lily Hermione Evans, do you take this man as your wedded husband for eternity?"  
  
"I certainly do, Albus!"  
  
"Then you may kiss the bride. May I present to you for the first time, Severus and Lily Snape!" Albus announced as the kiss broke, and Severus placed a ring of emerald around Lily's finger, as Lily placed a silver wedding band around Severus's finger.   
  
Dinner was a grand affair in the Great Hall, and none of the students nor staff understood exactly why. The Great Hall was decorated completely with Slytherin and Gryffindor colors, the Staff Table decorated with roses of red and silver, and all of the staff were wearing their formal robes.   
  
"What exactly is going on?"  
  
"I don't know, but it was a surprise to see Mum and Dad rushing over to Dumbledore's office along with Mad-eye and Remus. I wonder what's going on over there, probably Order buisness."  
  
"I don't think so. Flowers and music? more like a wedding announcement or something." Hermione deducted as she glanced at the Staff Table.   
  
"But wouldn't we know?" Harry asked, cocking his head to the side.   
  
"Perhaps it has something to do with Snape's explosion earlier this week." Hermione added as she took a sip of her drink. "Oy! this is sparkling apple cider.."  
  
  
  
The Great Hall fell silent as Dumbledore entered in his best robes, followed by Arthur & Molly Weasley, who waved furiously to Ginny and Ron. Remus Lupin followed, a pale complexion on his face, but smiling. Mad-Eye was at his side, whispering to him and rolling his magical eye all around the room.  
  
  
  
"Oh my god, is that Snape?!" Harry spat out as Ron and Hermione joined him in his shocked observation of their potions professor, with a gorgeous red-haired and green-eyed woman on his arm. The woman looked hauntingly familiar, Harry mused as he studied the two as they sat down at the Staff Table, and Dumbledore stood up to make an announcement...  
  
A/N: Hope the story's going good.. let me know by reviewing!! :) thanks to ALL who read and reviewed!! I love you all!! 


	8. Explainations

Albus Dumbledore informed the Great Hall that tonight was a night of celebrations, and merely sat down. The Great Hall then burst into a low-pitched hum, resonationg with the flying rumors and whispers from table to table.   
  
  
  
"The woman.. she looks really.. I just can't place it.." Harry whispered to Ron, biting his lip. "I mean..I just have to know who she is."  
  
"Yeah, mate. I mean, who would marry Snape!?"   
  
"Ronald Weasley!" Ginny and Hermione both hissed, as Mrs. Weasley turned her head towards Ron, as if tuned-in to her son's rude behavior. Ron swore she had some kind of radar in her mind, so fine-tuned to her childrens' behavior.   
  
  
  
"Severus?"  
  
"Yes?" Severus whispered, eyes shifting over to Lily, studying her green eyes. "Ah.. You want to know about Potter, hmm?"  
  
"It only seems fair, he's my son." Lily whispered, leaning to whisper into Severus's ear. "Tonight?"  
  
"Tonight in Albus's office....Is that all right, Albus?"  
  
  
  
Harry Potter was startled when Snape came over to their table, with his new wife on his arm.   
  
"Potter, Headmaster Dumbledore wishes to confer with you in his office after supper tonight. Don't be late." Snape said in a sneering tone of voice as he eyed Hermione and Ron. "Don't even think about hovering near the door, you two." Snape added as he glided away, Lily on his arm. As the two walked away, the woman turned her head, locking her eyes with Harry's.   
  
A shiver ran through Harry's spine, knowing his life would change, but how?   
  
"Harry? Are you all right?" asked Hermione as she frowned lightly and began to get up to go to Molly. Harry nodded, smiling a faint smile and leaving his seat, mumbling about his meeting with Dumbledore.  
  
"Harry, my dear boy, have a seat." Dumbledore said with a smile as Harry entered and decided to sit on a wingback chair, as far away from Snape as he could get, studying Snape and his wife with curious eyes. There was something very odd about his wife, she looked too familiar for comfort, Harry thought. He was brought back to reality by Dumbledore's offer for Lemon Drops.   
  
"No thank you, Headmaster. Just begin." Snape said dryly, as he conjured himself up a drink of firewhiskey.   
  
"Very well. Harry, Did you know your mother was one of Hogwarts' finest students, second only to Severus?"  
  
"No." Harry whispered, his eyes wide.   
  
"She was. She is a clever woman, and she managed to surprise me and Severus by her actions. Harry, you remember what Tom Riddle did with his diary?"  
  
"Yes. He saved his soul or something like that in the diary." Harry explained, shivering at the mention of Tom Riddle.  
  
"Very well, Harry. You see, there is a similar spell to that very spell, only it works with love. Your mother was deeply and completely in love her seventh year, spurring her to begin that very spell and contain her love in a diary which she hid in the Hogwarts library for years, until our dear Professor stumbled upon it in a drunken stupor."  
  
"Headmaster!" Snape snapped, spilling his drink and then disposing of it completely, choosing a butterbeer instead under Dumbledore's nearly withering stare.  
  
"...As I was saying, before I was oh, so rudely interrupted by Severus, Your mother explicitly put down her wishes that in case of her death, she was to be reserructed using that very spell by her lover or their child, if they ever survived the war. Do you understand all of this, Harry?"  
  
"pretty much so, Headmaster... you're telling me my mother can be brought alive by me?"  
  
"No." Dumbledore said sadly. "Alas, your mother hated your father with a passion, that, I only recently discovered last night. Why don't we let Severus and Lily explain their story?"  
  
*Mum and Snape!?* Harry gasped out in horror.  
  
  
  
"Harry, let us explain. Oh my sweetheart, you've grown so big." Lily began with a smile, her green eyes sparkling. "Oh, Harry, will you allow me to explain to you why I did this?"  
  
A long pause stretched through the room, as Harry gasped for breath, trying to blink back tears of anger and happiness. He didn't know whether to attack Snape or hug his mother. Finally, a nod from Harry allowed Lily to begin her tale.   
  
  
  
"I was in love with Severus ever since I saw him in that carriage the beginning of my sixth year. He was so smart, we used to study together in the library all hours of the night." Lily said, her face becoming slightly flushed, and a giddy smile made a brief appearance on her lips. Shaking her head, she continued "He and I somehow began a relationship. It lasted for years, until my death. He insisted I marry James Potter for my own protection... and the two of us hadn't counted on James's desire for a heir. You resulted from our marriage. Severus was so angry, he wished you were his. We both agreed to marry after the demise of You Know Who- Voldemort- and raise you as our own son, we already had chosen a new name for you, Peren Snape. We had our life all lined up and then I had to go and die." Lily sobbed, turning to Snape, burying herself into Snape's chest. Snape remained still, only his hands moved to stroke her hair, leaning down slightly to whisper some words of comfort in her ear.   
  
  
  
"Mr. Potter, you need to understand your mother's posistion. She had given birth to a child through a rape by her husband. She didn't expect to die. Clever girl she was, she did prepare for it. I certainly did not foresee this, but this has given me the happiness I lost all these years ago. I will allow you and your mother to have a relationship, but if you do anything to upset her, you will pay. Do you understand?" Snape said in a dark whisper, his eyebrow raised high on his forehead and his mouth an harsh line. Harry nodded dumbly, his eyes locked on his mother, who had recovered from her crying spell.   
  
  
  
"Harry, Severus brought me back to life. I love him with all my heart, and you need to understand that. We have recently followed through with our plans, and married. I do not care if you choose to awkenoldge James as your father, but you do need to understand that another child will result of our marriage, perhaps more will follow. I love you fiercely as a mother loves her own child, do you understand that? I already explained all of this to Severus years ago, and now I am explaining this to you, Harry."  
  
  
  
Harry tried to absorb all of this information, and sighed, studying his mother with a keen intrest. She looked so happy, leaning on Professor Snape. Ew, Professor Snape, could she have picked someone else like Remus to be her new husband?  
  
"Why Snape, why not Remus or Sirius?" Harry asked. Lily laughed long and hard at that statement, as Snape sat there with a small smirk on his lips, choosing to take a drink and let Lily explain the story behind Lupin and Black.  
  
"Everyone thought I would marry Remus. James had been stalking me for a week, and Severus was angry. We wanted to be together, and we agreed for Severus to take a polyjuice potion and go out on the field as Remus Lupin so we could be together out in public for one day. It kind of backfired on us, though." Lily said in between giggles, sounding like a young bride of twenty.   
  
"Yes, when Lupin came storming down into the Great Hall the next morning, and then the four of them proceeded to locate me and have it out." Severus said dryly as he slammed down his glass. "I have papers to mark. I will see you later tonight, Lily. Mr. Potter, Albus." Snape said as he swooped out of the room in a wave of his robes, leaving the room seeming even emptier without his presence.   
  
"This is all too weird..." Harry mumbled to his mother and Dumbledore, shaking his head.   
  
"Don't worry, you will get used to having Severus as your stepfather. Why don't you go visit with Remus? He can tell you some stories about your father if you like."  
  
"Don't you remember my father?"  
  
"To be honest, I spent as much time as I could away from him and at Severus's side. I was at his flat in London nearly the entire time I was pregnant with you. I went in labor at his house, he was the one who brought me over to St. Mungo's. That, is a very good story for another time, and I can't wait to see what happens this time." Lily said with a chuckle, her hand lightly resting over her slihgtly swollen belly.   
  
  
  
"....this time....?" Harry croaked out, and then everything went black.   
  
  
  
"Oh dear, should we get Poppy?" Lily asked as she leaned over Harry.  
  
A/N: thanks for bearing with me. For any of you who are confused, Harry is in fact James's son. But as a nice bonus to this story, she currently is carrying Severus's child. Please do read/review.. I would love it! :) 


	9. A Mother's Love

Harry woke up in the hospital wing, his head muzzy from landing so harshly on the floor of Dumbledore's office. He shook his head gingerly, wondering where he had dreamed up that ridiculous event, Snape marrying his own mother, who had been dead for over fifteen years. Severus and Lily Snape, Harry laughed to himself as he watched Poppy Pomfrey bustle over to his side and administer a potion of Snape's that he had brewed for the hospital wing.  
  
  
  
Lily bit her lip lightly as she held back outside the door to the hospital wing. She wouldn't blame the boy if he hated her. She still loved him fiercely, but wished he was Severus's child instead of Potter's. Lily smiled lightly as she rested her hand on her belly, comforted by the knowledge all that would change shortly. She only wished that her other son would be happy.   
  
  
  
Harry focused his eyes on his mother when she walked in the room gingerly, looking like Hermione when faced with a particularly puzzling piece of homework.   
  
"I will be honest with you..Harry.. I do not blame you if you hate me and Severus. But I do need to know."  
  
  
  
"Mum, how could I ever hate you? you loved me and gave up your life to save me. That is the ultimate price.. but... SNAPE!?" Harry winced at the thought of the two together. Lily laughed, her fears put at ease. She sat down on Harry's bed and smiled, holding on to his hand gingerly, still fearful that he would pull it out of her light grasp.   
  
"I love him. Simply answered." Lily said with a smile. "And you need to understand that. He has led a lonely life, and this is his first chance at happiness since I have died, I imagine. Do grant him this wish, Harry. That is all I ask. Some consideration for the man who gave his everything for the Order of the Phoenix."  
  
  
  
*I love you, Mum* Harry whispered as he bowed his head, a tear dripping on his coverlet.   
  
  
  
The next morning found Harry sitting at the Gryffindor Table, looking up at his mother at her perch next to Snape. The two looked like they belonged together, his stoic silence and her gleeful energy balancing out his darkness. Harry did hate to admit it to himself, that Severus Snape would be a great husband to his mother.   
  
A/N: kind of a short chappy, but I'm heading out of town without my computer for a few days, might be a bit before my next update. Any ideas or comments are GREATLY welcomed. If you HAVE TO flame, please do it in an constructive and respectful manner. Thank you! 


	10. A Werewolf's Memory

Harry Potter just couldn't face Professor Snape in class, he decided to skip Potions just for today, and sort things out...  
  
  
  
"Harry, what are you doing here?" Professor Lupin asked, holding his office door open to the tall youth. "I thought you had class with Severus?"  
  
"I do.. I just can't see him." Harry whispered as he sat down in a worn-out armchair. Lupin nodded and slowly shut the door, taking a seat behind his own desk, nodding in understanding. Lupin then poured two cups of tea, ready to listen to Harry, and to be there for the boy.   
  
"So, your mother probably told you a few things?"  
  
"Yes." Harry said with a nod and a sip of his tea. Lupin leaned back, wondering where to begin the tale. He sighed, and shrugged his shoulders weakly.   
  
"I was the one who discovered their relationship, after Severus used the Polyjuice potion. James was furious, he dragged Severus into a fight, we ended up having detention until the end of the school year." Lupin said with a smile. "After that, each time I saw lily, it was Severus this, Severus that. Even after she married. I think James was insanely jealous." Remus said with a shiver as he refilled his teacup with sad eyes, a thin frown on his lips and a furrow in his eyebrows as he recalled the night Harry was concieved, and Severus's anger. Granted, he and Severus had never been the best of friends, but he could have understood Severus's pain that night. Lupin suddenly laughed, recalling an intresting moment at the Potters' home right before Lily had died.   
  
"what's wrong, Professor?"  
  
"Just remembering. Harry... your mother loved Severus so much, she was planning to name you as an Snape, Peren Severin Snape. She had recently confessed to Severus and myself of her plan. You were asleep, and as soon as your mother said that name, you awoke and looked right at Severus..." Lupin said with a barking laugh, shaking his head. "Severus was so proud. He loved you as if you were his own child. He was planning to save you that night, you know?" At that revelation, Harry's eyes widened and his mouth opened slightly in surprise. Snape actually wanted to save him, of all people...  
  
  
  
  
  
Severus Snape was giddy, but he dared not show it to anyone in the vicinity of Hogwarts. He had recently discovered from Lily that their child had managed to survive, and in six months, he would be a proud father of a baby girl, which Lily had demanded to be named Narcissa Alice.  
  
"Why Narcissa Alice?" Severus remarked as Lily sat in his lap, sipping a cup of tea as he wound his arms around her slightly thickening waist. Lily smiled sadly.  
  
"Casualities of war. Look at darling Neville, and dear Draco. Neville without parents, and Draco as well, in a diffrent way." Lily said thoughtfully as she leaned her head on Severus's chest. Severus voiced his understanding and agreement. The couple sat in a comfortable silence, content to be near each other, sharing their love.  
  
  
  
After the small talk with Lupin, Harry felt slightly better, but he still felt squicked having Snape as a stepfather, and his own mother alive after seventeen years of being dead. Harry smiled wryly as he entered the library and saw Hermione and Malfoy carrying on an ancient tradition between Slytherins and Gryffindors. He shook his head, and decided to give them their privacy. After all, his mother hadn't done this foolishly, and Hermione was so much like Lily as Malfoy was similar to Snape.  
  
  
  
*Hermione and Malfoy, who would have thought?* Harry smiled to himself.  
  
  
  
"Mr. Potter, ten points from Gryffindor for missing my lessons this morning." Snape said icily, as he approached Harry from nowhere. That man should be a ghost, Harry thought tiredly as he shrugged. "Your mother wants to see you in our rooms. The password is Peren." Severus added with a small twitch of his lips as he turned to open the library door.  
  
"..Prof..." Harry replied, realizing he was too late, Snape had opened the door and spotted Hermione and Malfoy. Snape quietly stood there for a long moment, a faint glint in his eyes. After a quiet moment, Snape closed the door, and glanced at Harry meaningfully as he turned on his heel and swooped down on some helpless first-years, deducting ten points each for loitering around the halls. 


	11. No one Loves Me

"Harry!" Lily said with a smile on her lips as she hugged her son tightly. "How are you? I wanted to sit and visit with you for a while, my darling." Lily said sadly as she patted an chair near the fireplace. Harry took a seat, thinking of Hermione and Malfoy as he watched his mother bustle about getting the tea ready. Snape entered the room a few minutes later, shedding his professor's robes.  
  
He was wearing his usual black buttoned shirt and buttoned trousers, very well-tailored at that. He then put his hair back and took a seat at his desk in a corner of the room, eyes avoiding Harry, but studying Lily covertly under the guise of squinting at a newspaper. Harry knew better, he had seen this method used by many a seventh year boy in the library.   
  
  
  
"Thank you." Harry whispered as he was handed a cup of tea by Lily. The two spent a quiet moment sipping their cups of tea, enjoying the warmth before Lily spoke ever so quietly in a warm voice.   
  
"Do you have anything you want to know, Harry?"  
  
"No." Harry whispered back, studying the flames dancing in the fire, his mind tumbling with thoughts. "Yes. What happens now... now that you are alive?"  
  
"I plan on continuing my life with Severus. He has given me a precious gift, your life, and Cissa's."  
  
"Cissa?" Harry whispered, his stomach roiling. He didn't think he could take any more bombshells. Lily leaned back, and giggled. Harry finally remembered something she had mentioned about children. "Oh... Cissa, you..." Harry shivered and glanced at Snape, repressing the bile coming up his throat. "I see."  
  
  
  
"Does that bother you, Harry?" Lily asked quietly as Snape looked up from his paper, his eyes dark, and nearly narrowing dangerously. Harry knew he had entered dangerous territory with Snape. He took a breath and answered truthfully.  
  
"A bit. I mean, you're supposed to be dead and now, we're one happy family." Harry said, nearly snickering at the thought of Snape mowing the lawn in front of a home in Surrey.   
  
"If anything, Harry, we are not a family as of present. I do not think we will ever be a family." Lily said quietly, looking at Harry. "We did plan to have you part of our family, years ago."  
  
"Peren Severin Snape, right?" Harry whispered, his eyes darkening with slight anger. He couldn't believe that his mother had never loved his father, only loved the greasy bat of the dungeons. He hated Cissa, Snape, Lupin...   
  
  
  
Harry got up and abruptly left the room, leaving Lily sitting by the fire, teacup halfway to her mouth. "Foolish boy. Don't worry, Lily." Severus said quietly, watching his wife's eyes fill up with tears as she turned around to face him, her chin trembling slightly. "Ah, Lily.. don't cry, you know I hate that."  
  
"Sev..." Lily managed to choke out, then ran to the bedroom, leaving Severus standing in the middle of the room. Was it just him, or did they just have their first fight? Shaking his head, Severus headed up to see Lupin, to see what he had said to the boy to make him in such a state.  
  
A/N: any suggestions would help me... Sorry about the slow update, also.. spring fever.. g 


	12. A Trip to Hogsmeade

A/N: thanks to all my readers and reviewers! :)  
  
Remus Lupin had just sat down to enjoy his tea, with absolutely no interruptions yet again, when the door burst open and said object of his thoughts stalked in the room.   
  
"Why did you lie to me, Remus? My mum doesn't love me, she never did, she only loved that slimy bat Snape!" Harry shouted, his face red and blotched. Remus stood stiffly in his seat, teacup halfway to his lips. Remus let out a slow breath and wondered what he had done to deserve this chore of calming down Harry while Severus was perfectly capable of handling this dispute himself. As if compelled by thought, Severus glided into the room, dark eyes locked on Harry.   
  
"Mr. Potter, I think you owe Lily an apology."  
  
"I will not apologize, Professor!" Harry said darkly as his glare hotly set on Snape's face. After a long moment, Harry stormed out of the room under the strong gaze of Severus and Remus. Remus then turned sharply towards Severus. Upon that action, Severus narrowed his eyes and abruptly left the room to go somewhere in the castle to cool off, he knew he would curse someone if they got into his way. This simply wasn't going the way he imagined. He softly chuckled to himself as he entered his office, that he did not imagine being married to Lily after her death.   
  
  
  
A few weeks later, Severus had regained his cool composure and Lily had come to terms with Harry's dislike of her husband. She knew she could not expect her husband and son to accept each other's role in their lives in such a short period of time, but damned if Cissa didn't have a real family by the time she arrived to the world. Severus still insisted the child would be a son, but Lily knew better; after all, she was carrying the child.   
  
"Severus, do you need anything? I am going to Hogsmeade to get a few things. Do you need anything from the Apothecary while I am there?"  
  
"Lily, you shouldn--"  
  
"Severus, I've been stuck in here for days! I want to get out and see the world." Lily said, her green eyes sparkling dangerously. Severus took a sharp breath and set his lips in a thin line, looking over his wife with a dangerous glint in his eyes.   
  
"Very well, but you had better keep the hood up on your robes at all times. We do not want any Death Eaters knowing the fact you are alive until the time is proper." Severus said sharply as he handed Lily a deep purple robe. Lily took it resignedly and put it on. The aguement was settled. Lily was going to Hogsmeade.  
  
  
  
Severus decided to leave the woman alone, she was an independent spirit, that was for certain. She wouldn't have liked it if he had followed her to Hogsmeade and back. Perhaps he was just being overly protective...   
  
  
  
Lily was having a glorious time in Hogsmeade, she had bought Severus a new book to thank him, and several things for the baby, and a new Quidditch book for Harry, she knew he would love it. Lily hoped that Harry would just come round to his senses by the time Cissa was born, and quickly.  
  
A/n: sorry this chappy is short, but I am trying to get this fic done by the end of spring break.. *crosses fingers* so I can start some more I have on the back burner for the WIKTT challenge. 


	13. A New Light

LILY had returned from her shopping trip unscathed, much to Severus's relief and Remus's amusement.   
  
"Satisfied, Lily?"  
  
"Not yet." Lily replied sharply as she shrugged off her cloak, revealing her belly, slightly swollen with child. She turned to Severus, who was sitting behind his desk, with Remus in a seat facing the potions-master. "I.. I was just thinking about Harry. About us as a family."  
  
"I see." Severus whispered, as Remus took that moment to slip out of the room, knowing this discussion was not for his ears. Upon Remus's exit, Lily settled herself on Severus's desk, her eyes fastened upon his. She had come to an conclusion, the time out of the castle helping her clear her own head, having time away from Severus and her son had made her understand all too clearly her own intentions.   
  
"I gave birth to Harry, and deep in my heart, I do love him, he is a part of me. It is just difficult for me to see James in his face. I never loved James, but I can love Harry, given some time with him. He was snatched away from me when he barely began to live, and I have seventeen years of living to catch up on."  
  
"I see." Severus replied with a careful tap of his finger on his lip, contemplating the situation. Lily watched her husband carefully, knowing he loved Harry, but in his own unique way. Not as a father loved a son, but he did love the boy. "We will have to give him space and time, you understand, but I think with time, he will come to realize the depth of your love for himself and us. Granted, it is a complicated situation which does make my head spin at times." Severus said with a thin twitch of his lips. Lily smiled, her emerald eyes sparkling.   
  
  
  
*I love you, Severus* Lily whispered.  
  
  
  
Harry was sitting in the Great Hall, playing a game of chess with Dumbledore, the man having cornered him earlier and managing to goad him into a game of chess. Halfway into the game, Dumbledore brought up the subject of Snape, much to Harry's unease. He had only begun getting used to the idea of his mother being alive again.  
  
"Do you like your mother being alive?"  
  
"Yeah." Harry said, with a raised pair of eyebrows. "It's just a surprise to me, really."  
  
"Did you know that she never intended to die, she wanted to live for you and Severus?"  
  
"Yeah, I heard."  
  
"Mm." Dumbledore said, pursing his lips as he thought of his next move, letting Harry digest the latest comment. Harry sighed, looking at the conniving old man before him. "Ah! There are diffrent forms of love for each person, you know?"  
  
"Mm." Harry's turn to mumble, as he moved a piece, and frowned up at Dumbledore, chewing on his lip absently in thought.   
  
  
  
*Dumbledore does have a point...* Harry mused.  
  
  
  
He did love Hermione, but not in the way of romantic love. He loved Ron, but as a brother. Harry blushed furiously, realizing how foolish he had been, and incredibly rude to Lupin and his mother. They did care for him, but in diffrent ways. He had been thinking of love in defenite terms.   
  
"I think I've just lost, my boy." Dumbledore said with a sigh as he got up from the table, slipping off to his office. Harry sat there for a long moment, contemplating whether he should go apologize to his mother, or go to Lupin. His thoughts startled him, but he decided to follow his gut reaction.  
  
  
  
  
  
"Professor Snape?"   
  
"Yes?" Severus asked, as the door to his office swung open and Potter stepped in the room, his green eyes focused on the desktop before him. "Have a seat."  
  
"No. I was just.. I just wanted to inform you that I realize I behaved horribly, and I know you were just trying to do best by my mum."  
  
"I see." Severus said, slightly taken aback. This day had been quite a day for him, and the boy had always kept him on his toes, as well as his mother. "I am glad you realize that."  
  
"I realize you also were trying to do best by me, and I know you can never be a father to me, but... well, I do respect you." Harry whispered as he left the room abruptly, not leaving time for Severus to respond, leaving the Potions-Master still in his seat, the wheels turning in his head.   
  
  
  
*That boy, he should have been a Slytherin*  
  
  
  
"Harry, come on in." Lupin said with a wary expression in his eyes, watching the teenager stride in his own quarters. "what do you need?"  
  
"I just wanted to say I was sorry for yelling at you."  
  
"Thank you, apology accepted." Lupin said with a weak smile. "I understand you must have been frustrated, but still.. well, thanks."  
  
"You're welcome. Now, I have one more apology to make. I just don't know how to tell my mum." Harry said nervously, watching the grey-haired man before him break out in a sunny smile.   
  
"Just say you love her. That will be enough." Lupin said quietly, his eyes studying Harry. "That will be more than enough." Harry silently nodded, turning and leaving the DADA professor standing in the middle of the room, a smile on his lips.   
  
  
  
*Just in time* Remus chuckled.  
  
The door opened to the Snape private rooms, and Harry stood just into the doorway, looking folorn and lost before his mother, who stood near the fireplace, holding a blanket to her chest. Her green eyes matched Harry's, both wide and curious.   
  
"Mum... I love you." Harry said, his eyes boring into his mother's. "I understand I must have upset you, but I was upset myself, that you never loved my father."  
  
"Oh, Harry." Lily whispered, biting her lip in thought as she felt Cissa move inside her womb. She smiled, feeling that Cissa was agreeing with Harry. "Well, thank you. I do love you deeply, it is just difficult to come to amends with the fact that James is your father, that is all."  
  
"Mum, would it be all right if I stayed Harry Potter? It's just.. a bit too creepy to think of myself as Peren Snape right now, especially with you like that." Harry said, gesturing lightly to the swollen belly of his mother's. Lily smiled and nodded, gesturing for Harry to join her for a spot of tea. The two sat in silence, enjoying the company of each other. Things felt in place. Lily grinned.   
  
  
  
*I was wrong, now this is heaven* Lily thought as Severus entered the door, taking his customary place behind his desk in the corner, marking papers.  
  
A/N: 2 chapters left, Hope y'all enjoyed the tale! I've always wondered what would happen if Lily was alive and with Severus. Thank you to ALL who read/reviewed! THANK YOU! :-) 


	14. Library Fun

Harry, Lily, and Severus had fell into a respective pattern and pace of life. Harry still had a difficult time accepting his relationship with Severus Snape, but wasn't as angry, as long as his mother was happy and content. Lily grew to love her son fiercely, slowly becoming used to the fact that James was the boy's father and not Severus, now that Cissa was on the way.   
  
  
  
"Severus?" Lily asked one day, her eyes silently begging her husband of a question. Severus narrowed his eyes, hoping it wasn't one of those questions which could get him in trouble, and he did hate sleeping on the couch.   
  
"Yes, Lily?"  
  
"How much longer do you think I will be as big as Hagrid?" Lily asked, rubbing her large belly. Severus held back a laugh, imagining the groundskeeper in a large maternity robe. He did have to tell Minerva and Argus this image.   
  
"Oh, not that much longer. After all, you're only eight months along. Not too bad." Severus replied with an airy shrug. "Only one more month of carrying the baby."  
  
"When will you admit it will be a girl? You just want another son."  
  
"Lily.." Snape smiled as he went over to his distraught wife. "It does not matter, as long as the child is ours. That is all I would like." he said soothingly as he put his arms around Lily. Lily smiled, and giving him a kiss on the cheek as a sign his answers had been acccepted, and he would not need to sleep on the couch tonight. Severus smiled wryly, glad that he would get one night of rest for his back, the couch was so stiff.  
  
  
  
A week later, Severus was back to sleeping on the couch. Lily had kicked him out of bed, he had been snoring. Severus scowled, sleeping fitfully on the narrow couch was no way to spend a evening. In a very bad mood, Severus decided to go prowl the halls, it did manage to cheer him up by deducting points from Gryffindors. Maybe, if it was a lucky night, he would manage to deduct points from Granger and Malfoy. The two were the cleverest students in the school, finding the most creative and secretive spots in the school to fornicate. They had been clever enough to hide their relationship from the entire school, save himself and Potter. Severus chuckled to himself, having an idea to have a peek in the library, it had been his stomping grounds with Lily years ago, and maybe, just maybe, tradition had been taken up yet again.   
  
  
  
Severus smiled to himself, his instict had served him right yet again. There it was, Granger and Malfoy up against the bookshelves in the Potions section. A perverse justice was his tonight, Severus smiled, ever so glad he had the chance to deduct points, his mission accomplished. He couldn't help but hum a bar of the "Mission Impossible" theme song, a song he had learned from Lily a few months ago.  
  
"Busy, Miss Granger?"  
  
"Professor!" Miss Granger gasped out, her eyes wide as Mr. Malfoy turned to face Severus. There was embarassment and guilt written upon his face. Severus sighed, narrowing his eyes at the unlikely couple, who were straightening out their clothes.  
  
"Fornicating in the library... tsk." Severus hissed softly, his dark eyes glinting in the faint glow of flame. "Fifty points from Gryffindor, for you, Granger, and Fifty from Slytherin, for you, Draco." Severus continued in his hiss as he walked off, knowing that nothing could ruin his night.   
  
  
  
"Where's Severus?" Lily gasped out, her eyes wide as they scanned the room. "Damn him." Lily sighed as she slowly made her way to the fireplace, clutching her stomach. It had come, and the man had damned well be sure to go to the hospital wing upon the discovery of a very wet, and empty, bed.  
  
"Let's get you to a bed." Poppy said smoothly, as if women in labor popped into the hospital wing every night at 2 am. Lily sighed and allowed herself to be bustled about by Poppy, knowing someone would bring her situation to Severus's full attention soon. For now, she had to bear down and give birth to a beautiful baby girl without her husband at her side, yet again.  
  
  
  
A/N: sorry this took so long to update.. bad me! :-( oh well, the next chappy is the last one, anyway.. lol. Let me know if it warrants a sequel, like my Potionsmaster series. 


	15. The Correct Answer

LILY was crying in between labor pains, angry that Severus wasn't there for the birth of their first child. She knew she sounded like a spoiled brat, but who else could she share with this moment?  
  
"Lily, honey.. it's time. Go ahed and push." Poppy said from the other end of the bed, a smile on her lips. "It's time to bring your little baby into the world." At that statement, Lily bore down and pushed with all of her might, wanting this pain to end so she could hold on to her baby.  
  
"My, Lily.. it's coming, I can see the head.. just one more, honey.." Poppy clucked soothingly as a thin cry pierced the air. Lily groaned, asking Poppy why it still hurt. Poppy gasped, and laughed, tears coming out of her eyes. "One more, Lily. One more." Lily followed Poppy's directions, and out came another baby. Twins!  
  
"Why didn't you see this?"  
  
"Well, I think the girl was covering up her brother, twins tend to be small, really. So that explains why you were as big as Hagrid. I was a bit puzzled, at that, also." Poppy laughed, as Severus Snape swept into the hospital ward moments later, his hair disheveled and pale skin unusually flushed.   
  
"Damn students were in the way- Gryffindor has lost a hundred points, as well as Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw. The slytherins were smart enough to move out of the way." Severus panted as he collapsed into the chair, eyeing Lily. "I missed it again, didn't I?" Severus muttered sharply, shaking his head and looking at Lily with remorse. Lily only beamed at Severus as Poppy handed him his little daughter, wrapped in a green blanket. Poppy then bustled over and handed Lily her other baby, which happened to be a baby boy.   
  
"Lily!" Severus gaped out, his eyes wide at the baby boy in Lily's arms. "I love you, Lily." Severus whispered firmly as he leaned over and gave Lily one of his bone-melting kisses. Lily swore she had swooned, and smiled happily down at her children.   
  
"Thank you, Sev. What about the children, what should we name them?" Lily asked, as a soft knock at the door brought in Harry. "My, Harry, Look at the children- twins! a boy and a girl." Lily said proudly, waving Harry over. "Have a seat, honey, and why don't you hold Cissy? Severus, hand me Cissy, and take Francis."  
  
"Francis!? No, darling, what about Salazar?" Severus said, his eyes wide and gently handing his daughter to his stepson. Harry snickered as he watched the byplay between his mother and Snape. A smile broke out on Harry's face, he now felt that Severus Snape could, with time, become his stepfather.   
  
"Professor Snape? Mrs. Snape?" Draco asked, gently sliding into the room with Hermione at his heels. "We just wanted to see the children."  
  
"Oh, Hermione, Draco, my darlings! what would you say to being Narcissa Alice's godparents?" Lily asked with a smile on her lips as Harry handed Cissy to Hermione, whose eyes filled with tears. Draco stood near Severus, a proud glint to his eye.   
  
"We would be honored, Professor Snape." Draco said as he gently pushed back Narcissa's blanket, a arm around Hermione, the two gazing down at the baby. Lily shot Severus an all-knowing glance, giving it only a few months before he broke down and proposed to Hermione. Harry only could manage to sit there, mouth slightly agape like a codfish. Severus snorted in amusement at the sight.   
  
"What about the boy?" Severus asked, cradling his son in his arms. Draco and Hermione glanced over at the boy, Draco now holding Cissy.   
  
"Remus!" Lily called out, a smile on her lips and her eyes twinkling.  
  
"Remus?" Severus asked, a frown on his lips. "Remus Snape? Damned Gryffindors... as long as his middle name is Silas, then we have a deal." Severus said with a nod, looking down his nose at Lily. Lily, Harry, Draco, and Hermione all let out loud laughter, while Severus sat there, a sharp frown on his lips. "When I compromise, you're supposed to agree!"  
  
"No, Severus, I'm supposed to agree with you." a voice said from the doorway, as Remus Lupin chuckled, making his way to kiss Lily on the top of her head as well as Hermione. Severus sat there, his turn to look like a codfish. Like stepfather, like stepson, Harry thought with a small laugh. He liked the idea of accepting Severus as his stepfather, although he knew it would take time....   
  
A year later found Cissa and Remy running around the Slytherin Common room, driving Draco frazzled. He had never known what it meant to be the official babysitter of the Snape twins, until now. Aargh, Draco muttered as he managed to grab Cissa, and Hermione managed to come up with Remy in his arms.   
  
"Hello, Draco, I thought you might need some help. Severus and Lily are home, but they wanted a private moment." Hermione's flaming red face gave her away.   
  
"You walked in on them, didn't you?" Draco said with a laugh. Hermione scowled at Draco, sticking her nose in the air.   
  
"Fine, let's see how you handle changing their diapers all by yourself without magic."  
  
"Sorry, 'Mione."  
  
"Hermione! Mione makes me sound like a maid." Hermione said with a laugh as she tickled Remus in her arms. Draco laughed as he bounced down on the couch with Cissy. Hermione joined him, and the two spent some time tickling the twins, playing games, and warding off pleas for cookies and candy.   
  
"Children are a chore. I admire those single parents." Draco said with a sigh. "I never imagined what hell my father went through, and now I understand." Draco said with a mirthless chuckle. Hermione put her arm around Draco, bringing him close. Draco glanced at Hermione and smiled at the sight of Remy asleep in her arms, as well as Cissy. "Since they're asleep, how about some private time of our own?" Draco teased coyly as he put the twins down on a nearby couch and returned to Hermione, taking her into his arms. The two spent the next few minutes nuzzling each other happily, but then Draco halted, pulling back and kneeling on the floor facing Hermione on the couch.   
  
"What?" Hermione asked, a frown on her lips.   
  
"Hermione Jane Granger, will you marry me?" Draco asked solemnly, his eyes never leaving Hermione's. Hermione sat there, her mouth gaping as she collected her thoughts.   
  
"I never thought I would see the resident know-it-all speechless, but now I have seen it all." A cold voice spoke from the enterance of the room. Severus Snape stepped into the Slytherin common room, gathering up his twins. "Well, don't you have an answer for my godson?"  
  
"Yes. The answer is Yes." Hermione said smoothly, a smile on her lips as she drew Draco into her arms, the two knowing their lives would never be the same again.  
  
Finis.  
  
A/N: finally, finally it is done! Heh. Thanks for putting up with me through this.. hope y'all enjoyed it! pls do read/review. :-D 


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